The Price of Freedom - Chapter Four: Cutler Beckett (part two!)

Spoiler alert: he gets better.

Pardon my hiatus.

No, I have not forgotten about this.

The Price of Freedom - Chapter Four: Cutler Beckett (Part One)

You don't know how long I've been waiting for this.

The Price of Freedom - Chapter Three: Doña Pirata

Why two chapters in a row? I had time, and this one was short.

So here's my summary of chapter three:

The Price of Freedom - Chapter Two: Lady Esmeralda

Hunchback of Notre Dame fanfiction crossover?

Maybe.

When we last left our hero/drunken pirate/former pirate/crouching-drunk-hidden-gentleman, he and his jolly crew of the East India Trading Company of which he is part (yes, THAT Company) were being pursued by a haunting pirate vessel from his past and such. Good Mister Sparrow had commenced to mentally panic about the situation before diving into Flashback Land and explaining to the reader (indirectly, of course) his past relationship to the (female) captain of the ship. As soon as he is snapped back into the present, hilarity ensues, and that is our "heading" for this chapter.

The Price of Freedom - Chapter One: Fair Winds and Black Ships

The fact that I could have been reading the first part of this chapter with a variation of "Gloria" playing in the background amuses me greatly.

Now that the vaguely vague 'lol this isn't the story this is just some completely unrelated description of the setting' crap is over, it's actually time to get this party started and actually read about Pirates. Because that's what I came for, isn't it?

The Price of Freedom - Predictions and Prologue

As you might have guessed, I have been waiting for this book for a while. Certain friends have recommended it to me, and told me to read it as soon as possible. Yet, however, I hadn't found the time or resources to find the book until today, and now, long story short, I have it in my hands, and my Pirates of the Caribbean journey has begun a new leg.

Before I officially start reading, I am publicly going to make some predictions about what I think the book is going to have, and as I go I will evaluate these predictions... you know how this works.

So here are Faryl's predictions for The Price of Freedom:

The Price of Freedom

I begged.

I waited.

I begged.

I begged.

I whined.

I complained.

I waited.

I reserved at the library.

I waited.

I complained.

I waited.

I received.

And now I read.

Monster WHYYYYYYYYYYY

(Quite obviously, a companion to the infamous novel tWHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYlight.)

It's been a blast. It really has.

I've been carrying you around for nearly nine months now, and every day of your miserable existence has made me lesser of a human being than I was before. But now, no more. The time has come for us to part at last, and do I feel guilty about it? As guilty as I would feel if Bella Swan was hit by a truck. My truck. And then roasted alive. In my barbecue. I have twenty-four hours to dispose of you, and I don't even know where to start except with this: Adieu.

Hi guys.

I figured I might as well post this so I won't have to do any explaining later.

Basically, the title explains itself. My name is Faryl, and I am, by nature, a critic. In a way, my style is similar to that of the Nostalgia Critic (which, by the way, no matter how much I watch, I haven't watched enough), but really... I'm not the Nostalgia Critic. Nor am I the Nostalgia Chick. Because both would sue me.

No, I think a more fitting description for what I do would be more along the lines of "the twenty-first century pop culture bullcrap taste-tester and proceed-to-spontaneously-vomit-er." That's a terrible name. Quite frankly, I take a lot of things that are written today (as in, NOW) and tell you why it either sucks (the more likely) or is actually worth reading.

I am automatically biased against this stuff because I am totes hipster yo mainly because most of the stuff in question has been watered down so much, it really can't be taken seriously by either its intended audience or anyone else who picks up that book and happens to like reading in that genre (and who has seen better books in that genre - or YOUNGER!)... or, for the record, BOTH! And that's only the bad stuff. I do admit I'm not as analytic as a lot of other reviewers out there, so between us, our opinions might differ dramatically. However, I have my own way of going about things, and somehow... it works.

And I know I'm doing my fair share of advertising, but one of my biggest inspirations in doing this was, by far, Mark Reads, which can be found at markreads.net. Even though I've only read the Twilight and Harry Potter reviews, his writing has influenced me greatly, which has partially led me to the type of reviewing I have today. That, combined with the Nostalgia Critic (the artist presently known as Voltaire was in there somewhere, too) taught me that spontaneous satire had its place - media reviews.

And so, here I am. I'll have my first speal posted in a bit, and let me tell you, it isn't pretty.